At the same time I wanted to start an art gallery in Manhattan. I saw a shop for rent on 6th St. between 2nd and 3rd , behind St. Mark’s Place. A place with a lot of charm. Anne was very excited about the idea. When we investigated we could even put an apartment in the back. We rented the place and I made it into a gallery and named it the Edification.

I was again keeping myself very busy. The work was very exciting. I met a lot of artists and people of all kinds, and saw the commercial art world from the inside. With the art gallery, I could run educational programs linked to the position I had with the arts center. I also published a quarterly newsletter where I invited artists to write about art. I had a lot going on.

There were plenty of things I did not like about the A A Arts Center. To put it in a nutshell, I did not think they knew, nor cared to distinguish art from entertainment. Many of their other programs were superficial. I began to feel uncomfortable to speak for them as a whole. I went to a Chinatown outreach Convention and met Pui and others. Pui was a MSW who headed the Lower East Side Family Union, the Chinatown chapter. Meeting the group made me re-evaluate how I was spending my time. My heart told me that I might be making more of a difference by helping the needy rather than affiliating myself with the art center that I was critical of. So I wrote a letter of resignation to quit the art center, and called Pui up. She told me that she could rewrite my resume by credit points, and there would be a job as an out-reach worker at the head quarters, for which I was qualified to apply. I went for the interview and met many of the people including the head of the organization Mr. Herbert. He was a wonderful, giving man. His age and health wasn’t helping him much, but he was still working in his full capacity to run this important joint. Everyone in the place was courteous and professional, very different from a normal New Yorker on the street.

Now I saw a whole different world. One that was at times sweet, but mostly of the miserable living of the Chinese Americans and immigrants to the worst degree. My duty was to seek out cases and persons who had fallen through the cracks. Some immigrants were so afraid and isolated by their own ignorance of the US society. They were abused and enslaved. On top of it was the language barrier, which blocked them from seeking help. I was good at advocating for them, and hooked them up to the system because I was relentless, and knew how to locate resources for them. I guess the best was, I showed them how not to be afraid, because I seldom had fear. One of the cases was of a child who was run over by a car and thus paralyzed. Both parents worked extremely long hours trying to provide for him, but nevertheless, the kid was getting the worst care. They kept him in their dilapidated apartment and he was not schooled. They all were existing like slaves. They were supposedly hooked up with the system, but the case worker didn’t do much, if anything. It was a case in which, I felt I had helped.

Anne was at this time working as a clinical ER attendant in the Bronx. Life in Manhattan was getting stressful for both Anne and I. Seeing all these needy people with so little help. We began to take long weekends to go camping. We rented a site at a private campground, and became friends with Jeanne and Jerry who owned the campground. They were close to their retirement, and they ran a very nice campground. We set up a tent on a wood platform I built, next to the creek. That was our second home for awhile. It was a great place to head to after a week or two of Manhattan living. The country became so attractive to us that we started to explore the possibility of making a home there. The only thing I myself had to think twice about, was the gallery that I loved. However actions spoke loud enough when Anne and I were taking longer and longer weekends. Our hearts were leaving the city at a much faster speed. So one time we stopped by the hospital in Walton to check out our prospects. The administrator was thrilled that a doctor would just show up in his office and ask for a job. Our dirty backwoods camping outfits did not affect Anne’s chances. Then we drove around and before long we bought an overpriced, rundown farm house. But for us, we were so excited about this venture of our life, everything was beautiful. I wrapped up the gallery by giving myself a show in which I put as many works in, as the space allowed. It was a review for me to see what to take for the next step. The gallery provided me a marvelous avenue which, I believe, would have lead me to fame and a brilliant career. I have no doubt. However I was a painter and my priority in life has always been to give myself the best spiritual space to grow as a painter.

The more committed I was with painting, the more I choose to not be in the establishments that were connected with painting. I did not find people who painted, understood or cared about the same kind of concerns I had. One major difference was that I never looked at painting the same as making a product for consumers. I believed my contribution to the society was based on the learning from my painting. In order to paint in a way that I felt as a true achievement, I needed to purge myself of the outside factors that conflicted with my belief. Since I left Minnesota, my need to exchange ideas and thoughts in painting had diminished. I was very comfortable in my mental isolation to be alone with my art. By this time I had seen enough of the reality of life and the society, to get away from it all. Though it was scary to take such a lonely path, I knew it was the right thing to do. I would not end up with an impressive resume, but this adventure would lead me to figure out painting my way. Essentially I was retiring from the art world in order to commit to purify my art.

There was another reason of huge importance to leave the city, which was that Anne and I were thinking about having a child. Anne and I believed Manhattan was not a place to bring up a child. Anne also thought she was not cut out for just putting bandages on wounds. Because of the shortage of supportive resources in NYC for the multitudes of the needy, they could not receive real cures. As a provider, she felt that she could only bandage them up and send them away. She wanted to find a situation where she could do some continuous care, and where she could build relationships with her patients.

The house we bought was on 9 acres of land. It had a bass pond which was fed by the highest quality spring water. We right away bought some chickens, sheep, goats, a cow, a pair of pigs, a donkey and inherited a German Shepard. Over night we were farmers. The idea of growing what we ate, made all the sense in the world. It was also in my bones to be in touch with the elements. I bought a bow and arrows, and practiced up to get my first hunting license.

My first deer kill was dramatic. There was an apple tree about 15 yd from an upstairs window. Deer came thru every sunset. I set up a target and perfected my shots. It was the first day of deer season. I was waiting on a rocking chair for the deer to arrive while Anne was cooking dinner. I fired my first shot with my heart jumping up to my throat. I knew it was a good shot, so we ate dinner. I went out and found the arrow which was full of blood, but I did not see the deer. I went back in the house and started getting panicked, and asked Anne to come out to help me tract the deer. She was more than unwilling, but she came with me anyway. I was too excited to know where to begin but Anne smelled the deer in the tall glass. We found the deer in the dark about 20 yds from where I shot it. I was relieved and dragged it to the open under the light. Anne ran back in the house. But when I started gutting the deer, I was again lost as to how deep to cut the skin. So in the house I went for Anne’s help because she had to know by being a doctor. Anne and I were so emotional that we both broke into tears. Well, after the talk, we both feel better and I got the deer gutted, skinned and hung before I went to bed. I had to learn everything about country living by trial and error. Thinking back, we never regret any of it because life has been so much better in quality. Our life is connected to the earth and we learn to appreciate nature and its provisions. Life is so much more meaningful. We do not have to wait for Thanksgiving to realize how lucky we are. I was taking on being the cook of the family, and I really enjoyed exercising my right to create when I cooked all the food we raised, gathered, hunted or bought. There is a special pride to make a dish with so much work and care from raising to eating.

The story of the pig giving birth was another of our sore farming experience. First of all I did all I was told by building a birthing crate with escape slots for the baby pigs. Mother pigs have a tendency to roll and trap babies against the wall, killing them. It was in the winter. I hung a heat lamp low enough to provide warmth for the newborns. When I thought it was almost time, I placed an intercom between our bedroom and the pig pen. Pigs are very noisy at night, so for a couple of nights I end up with a very mad wife, but no babies. Then we had the babies but the worst distraster at the same time. The heat lamp burnt a hole about a foot round wound on mother pig’s ham. I ended up with the chilling job of cutting out the burnt flesh and applying silvadine daily. Anne was actually giving me moral support. But after that I never wanted to be a surgeon when I grew up. Mother pig healed extremely well. When it came time for castration of the male babies, Anne did half of one and then I called the vet the next day to finish the job. We had lots of fun rounding the babies up when they got loose. It had to be caused by my childhood starvation. I spent over two thousand dollars for feeding the pair in one year.

Not long after we moved in, I began to gut the whole house. It was one other thing I found I could use my total creativity. I did not know how much work I was getting myself into. I spent almost two years finishing the whole house, partly because most of the house was rotted beneath the wall board. It was amazing that it was still standing. Anne was a trooper thru out all this. When I realized I had to tear most of the house down, we had an outdoor kitchen for a few months and the kitchen sink was supported partly by the chimney.